#2 AFTER CANCER DIAGNOSIS THROUGH SURGERY
After careful consideration of where to get a second opinion, I chose Kettering Cancer Center in Ohio. It was reasonably close to home and appeared to be a good option. After meeting with the oncologist and surgeon at Kettering, I was faced with reality. They agreed I must have the tumor surgically removed. However, the oncologist gave me some hope. She said if the cancer had not moved into my lymph nodes, then the treatment plan could be easier. As a result of that possibility, I was grateful we chose to get a second opinion.
Kettering wanted to do further testing to be exactly sure the location of the tumor. I experienced multiple tests and lost track of how many painful numbing needles I had inserted into my breast. In addition, I get claustrophobic in tight or unmovable positions. Therefore, I learned that Xanax was my friend. I would take 1 or 2 pills before procedures to help relax me. The problem with that was I had to have a driver take me for the procedures.
The first additional test was an MRI. The results were disturbing. They found two smaller additional tumors near the original. As a result of that, they tried to do an ultrasound biopsy. The ultrasound could not locate the smaller tumors. Therefore, they sent me for an MRI biopsy.
I will never forget the MRI biopsy. I laid on my stomach for the procedure. My eyes were closed to help me not feel confined hopefully preventing a claustrophobic attack. My breast dangled in two holes under me. I could hear the medical personnel talking and trying to explain what they were doing. Again, the numbing needle pain HURT!!! Once it was numbed, tissue was removed. They sent the tissue to be examined. Thankfully that pathological result showed the two smaller tumors were benign. I praised the Lord for some good news!
Even though I explained we changed service to Kettering, that did not mean one location. The first MRI was done in Hubert Heights. The Ultrasound was done at Kettering Cancer Center in Kettering. Then because the only location that did the breast MRI biopsies was in Miamisburg, we had to travel there. I remember that drive in particular. I had to be there early in the morning, and it was pouring rain in the total dark. There was a road detour, and we had no idea where we were going except for the Waze navigation system on my cell phone. If we would have lost reception, I honestly do not know what we would have done. We were in the middle of nowhere. I did not like traveling on inter-state roads. If there was an accident, traffic could be stalled causing late appointment arrival. I also did not feel as safe on them. Instead of traveling the inter-state, we usually traveled across country on two lane highways. I just wanted to share that the travel to the testing sites was sometimes strenuous which added stress to the already stressful situation.
Another added stress to this whole journey was Covid-19. The MRI Biopsy was the first time I was required to wear a mask and have my temperature taken. As time went by, Covid restrictions were added causing a lot more stress to the already stressful life I was experiencing.
During one of the many trips to Kettering Cancer Center, I visited the wig shop. I knew that chemotherapy would eventually make my hair fall out. In preparation, I went wig shopping. I tried multiple wigs on. I really did not like any of them. They just all looked so strange on me. I also had to decide what color I wanted. My original hair was beginning to gray. However, because it was long, halfway down my back, the bottom portion of my hair was auburn color. Because I knew I would never personally have auburn hair grow back in, I chose a wig in that color. I also chose what was called a “lace front” wig. It made the edge around my face look more natural. The way the wig was made you could see through the hair to the scalp which looked more natural. This was exciting visiting the store but felt very strange. The wig cost over $500. Thankfully, my insurance was willing to pay for it if I got a discount. The shop gave a discount if I paid cash. I was incredibly grateful insurance reimbursed me for the basic cost of the wig.
The surgeon previously explained the ramifications of having a lumpectomy versus a mastectomy. She explained that if she performed a lumpectomy, she would make an incision in the areola. Therefore, the scar would not be as noticeable. I chose a lumpectomy instead of a mastectomy because I could not imagine looking at myself without “it” there.
Outpatient surgery was scheduled for Monday, April 6, 2020. I definitely was not looking forward to surgery. The Friday before surgery I had to go to Kettering Hospital to have radiation seeds implanted. They did an ultrasound to see exactly the tumor location. Then they injected radiation seeds into that area so that the surgeon knew exactly where and how much tissue to remove. During surgery, the surgeon used something like a Geiger counter to locate the surgery location using the radiation seeds.
The day of the surgery came. Of course, I was very scared. The picture was taken right before I went to the hospital sign in desk. It was during Covid-19, so I had a mask on. Thankfully, my husband was allowed to go with me and stay in the hospital during the outpatient surgery. Because of Covid-19, he was the only person allowed with me. My mom really wanted to go but was not allowed to.
My husband was allowed to wait with me in the surgery prep room once I got changed into the hospital gown. They used a devise I never had seen before to insert the IV needle. The nurse was able to see exactly where the vein was so she could insert it accurately the first time. After she inserted it, it hurt. I complained and they said it was good. They did not do anything about my pain. It hurt the entire time until I fell asleep in surgery.
I remember the surgeon coming in to talk with me before surgery. I was embarrassed because I did not recognize her. She had long dark hair but this time she had a surgical cap on.
The anesthesiologist talked with me. I explained how I do not respond well to anesthetic. I begged for him to do whatever he could so I would not throw up afterwards. While still in the prep room, one of the technicians began the anesthetic through my IV.
I remember laying on the bed as they wheeled me out of the prep room. We went down this hallway and that hallway turned this corner and that corner. The last thing I remember, we came to some type of room. I could tell we still had to turn right to continue to the surgery room. I do not ever remember making it to the surgery room. I went under the anesthetic before we arrived.
During surgery, the original cancerous tumor was removed. They also removed three lymph nodes. The lymph nodes were removed to determine if the cancer had moved to another location. As a result, I ended up with an additional incision in the lower portion of my right arm pit.
The next thing I remembered after surgery was waking up in recovery. I floated in and out of consciousness. I was very sleepy. After a while, my husband came and sat in the small area. Shortly after that, they said I needed to get dressed. I did not physically feel capable of getting dressed. I told them I was not ready. I could not. Somehow someone helped me get dressed. The next thing I knew, I was being wheeled in a wheelchair to go home. I kept saying I was not ready. I absolutely did not feel recovered enough to leave the hospital, but they did not give me a choice. Later I wondered if they rushed me because of Covid-19.
A few hours after surgery, I was on my way home. I was grateful I did not throw up. Whatever the anesthesiologist gave me really worked well. We had about an hour drive home. Thankfully, I was not in much pain. They had me wear a specific surgical bra. It gave me a lot more support. I was to wear it or a sports brad for a couple of weeks. The support from it helped.
Once I got home and for several days after I was in a LOT of pain. After I could take the bandage off, I realized the pain from the lumpectomy was very minimal. The severe pain was coming from the area they removed the lymph nodes. It hurt REALLY bad. I do not like to take prescribed pain medication. So, I did not take any of the prescription pain medicine. Reflecting back, I should have taken some. It stayed swollen for quite a few days. This picture I don’t think is very appealing, but I wanted to be transparent with what I experienced.
The pathology report from the lumpectomy showed that the surgeon had successfully removed all the original cancerous tumor which I praised the Lord for. However, one of the three 3 lymph nodes that they had removed was cancerous. I was frustrated, disappointed, angry that my God had not answered my prayer hoping it would be benign. However, I know God always answers prayer. It just may not be in the way we expect because He knows His bigger purpose. Because the cancer had moved to the lymph nodes, the oncologist said the chemo treatment would have to be more extensive. Therefore, she recommended I move my treatment back to my hometown. I agreed that if there were any treatment complications living an hour away was not the ideal situation.
Now that I have had many months to heal since that surgery, I will say that I am incredibly pleased I chose the Kettering surgeon to do the lumpectomy. The incision healed so well it basically cannot be seen. I am also glad that I chose to get a lumpectomy instead of a mastectomy. I basically look the same. My breast is a little smaller in size but unless you knew I had surgery; you would not be able to tell. In fact, even a doctor ten months later could not tell where the incision was. He had to ask me to show him.
Thank you for coming along this journey as I share My Story. Next time, I will share additional tests that brought a totally unexpected turn of events to my journey.
I want to leave you with a scripture encouragement. This happens to be my life scripture. Anytime I am going through trying times I gravitate to this scripture. Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (NIV) If we give our situation to God and thank him for how he has brought us through in the past, we can experience His indescribable peace. No-one else or anything can give us the peace that God can. That peace can comfort us as we walk through the trials of life.
Please join me on the next step of my journey…. as this rollercoaster ride of my life continues and becomes even more challenging……
